Job Hunting Feels like Online Dating only a lot Worse: Part I

Seriously. The process of finding and applying for jobs is like dating online. I should know! I'm a proud 5-year retired veteran, as in, I dated online (a lot!) for 5 years, but am now retired (married) and yes, I met him online!


I had fun dating online. I made profiles on a few different sites, started sending and receiving emails and then...wha-lah! I met a lot of nice guys, ate a lot good food, laughed, danced and flirted until I dropped! It felt GREAT! I felt pretty, desirable and like the world was full of options...just for me.


Finding jobs to apply for involves a similar process. I go to job boards (dating sites) to look for jobs (men) and make myself available there (post a professional profile) as well. I apply to as many jobs (send my resume) as I can handle and schedule interviews (dates.)


Wait a minute?! Where are the flowers? Candles? Romance? Ugh. The similarities job hunting and online dating are structural only. Of course, I'm being facietious -- I don't expect potential employers to romance me. But couldn't it all be just a little more fun?


Regardless, I shall press on! I applied to 5 jobs just today -- my prince...er...new boss is out there somewhere!

The Reinvention of...Me!

I've said that I'm reinventing myself in 2009. For the record, I really mean it! I don't know where I'm headed, but I do know that I haven't been happy (at work) for quite some time and am determined to head in a different direction. The question is: in what direction should I go?

I've taken a million personality tests over the years. Campus Crusade for Christ is great at developing their people -- many of the tests I've taken are from my time with them. So I've gathered all of them that I can find and have been studying, analyzing and investigating with an intensity and anticipation that I haven't felt for some time. I'm looking for clues to my future's path. It's exciting...and confusing!

It's exciting because I sense the possibilites, but confusing because some of the possibilities seem to be total opposites. I think that there are probably a number of things I could do and be successful. The question is: what will leave me with a sense of satisfaction? When I get to the end of my life, what accomplishments will I look back on and be pleased with?

Developing a personal mission statement will help answer those questions -- for sure. I also think I need to "verbally process" my possibilities here and dialogue with with my friends. All things in my mind become more clear once they come out of my mouth:)

In one particular personality and skills inventory, my interests and strengths were matched with those in various job fields -- my top 20 matches were listed. I noticed that almost all of the top 20 could be put into 4 basic (very basic!) job/work categories: Religion, Law, Education and Social Work. See what I mean about confusing!?

After my initial confusion though, I started to see some similarities between the job fields and that gives me hope. They each involve: work that makes a meaningful difference, relating to people, relating to them about their problems, helping people to solve their problems, dealing with the inner life of others and motivating others in one way or another. They all involve the government on some level, require that one be a student of people and involve varying levels of social theory. Then, once I thought I about their differences, I realized that I think they are minimal: educational requirements, public perception and level of formality required on the job.

It's all so interesting! So I'm not afraid of the confusion, even though I don't have answers yet. I do welcome your input and stay tuned -- I think I'm a good story:)

Personal Mission Statement: Rough Draft

I thought that yesterday was Monday all day until I woke up this morning. I don't care so much about missing out on a Tuesday as I do feeling like I missed out on an entire 24 hour period of time. It's time for more structure in my life!

Along those lines, I thought I'd take a crack at developing my own personal mission statement. The only thing I'm sure about right now is that I want to reinvent myself in 2009. I feel fairly sure that that means I'll be in working in a new job field, but which one? This Internet age we live in means that, unfortunately, the world really is my oyster -- it's easy to become overwhelmed with options! So I think a personal mission statement will help.

I'm only aiming for a rough draft today -- I'll refine it as time goes by -- would love your input too!

My Personal Mission Statement

I want to engage in work that makes a meaningful difference in the world, solving complex problems involving people and relationships that others are unable to solve. I want opportunities to use my enthusiasm, creative ideas, keen intuition and independent spirit to navigate difficult terrain in places where others easily give up.

I'm sure that I'll refine, add and subtract as time goes by. Hopefully though, even in the short term, it will help provide some structure and direction in my life and in my job-search.

Blogging every day is hard

Actually, blogging every day sounds fun. Blogging every day about searching for a job is really hard! Never fear though -- I'm continuing to blog and to search. I will find a job...eventually.

I'll go easy on myself today -- it is the begining of the week after all. Some job search humor that I'm sure everyone can appreciate. Enjoy!

I digress!

I've been keeping my blog positive and focused on my skills lately to help with the job search. However, today I must digress -- indulge me.

I worked a 4-day promotion back in January and was just paid for it today -- yes, more than 3 months after the job was finished! Furthermore, the paycheck was short by $62 and change and didn't include a reimbursement for personal monies that I laid out for the event. I called the guy who hired me, no response. I emailed him, no response. Don't get me wrong -- he will pay! There's also a lot more to the story, but it's not worth repeating here.

I'm writing about it because looking for and getting jobs is hard enough, not to mention actually working! Encountering scum like this guy makes me paranoid and a bit shy about working for anyone. Actually, I most amazed at the fact that this guy does work at all! How does he get anyone to trust him on an ongoing basis? Or maybe that's how he survives -- continually looking for new customers and employees. Anyway, having my teeth kicked in today in the form of a short paycheck was not what I needed to move forward with my own job search.

Don't worry about me though: I'll fight for what's owed to me and I will get paid. I will also find more work and I will work again. This is all a good reminder to me to keep on my toes and not be shy about asking hard questions of employers without being overly hard of course. There are some great employers out there, but you just never know.

Focusing my Skills: Part 2

Coming up with a skill-summary...is hard! I am the long-winded and all-inclusive type. Summarizing, by it's very nature, requires me to be brief and exclusive. Ugh. Regardless, I think I can push through my verbosity...here goes!

PEOPLE
I need to work with people. I need to talk to them, listen to them and be in front of them. Whether it's teaching, training, selling or analyzing I love, love, love working with people! Specifically, I need to be face to face with either large and changing crowds or one on one with regular clients.

PROBLEMS
I get bored so easily. I worked in a parts packaging factory for 3 months in college and almost died of boredom! I simply cannot be involved in repetive activity. I like solving problems that have to do with people, plans and systems. Specifically, I need to have ample opportunity to learn, plan, strategize, organize/reorganize and create solutions that didn't exist before.

PASSION
I have a heart, I cannot hide it and I don't want to! I'm not some basket case of emotion who cries at Kleenex commercials. I'm just not a hard-hearted, it's-just-business-don't-take-it-personally decision-maker. I need to be able to love what I'm doing. I prefer work that has some weight to it, some meaning and lasting value. Specifically, I need to feel something for my work and to be able to show what I'm feeling.

Not too bad! I'm sure I'll continue to update and refine the list -- I also need to work on thinking about the list in negative terms and work on describing the type of environment I thrive in. For now though, I can already feel my job search focusing itself -- some job apps are calling my name!

Focusing my Skills

In the middle of laying down our new flooring, I decided to paint one of our living room walls. Why not make an already drawn out project even larger?! Anyway, as I painted I rediscovered a forgotten skill: cutting in. I can cut in an almost perfectly straight line. It's a thing of beauty really.

The rediscovery of that one skill has significantly helped me to draw a line (forgive me!) in the sand of my job search. There are several lessons I can list out quickly...

• No skill is insignificant! Being able to cut in with paint may seem small -- I don't want to paint walls for a living. However, it demonstrates my steady hand and that is a transferable skill. My timing (of the painting) demonstrates my love of/skill for efficiency and my desire to paint shows my affinity for beauty. I'm so transferable I can't shut it off.
• Transferable skills may show up in surprising places, so it's good to be aware. Even just spending a few concentrated minutes a week thinking through tasks and errands may uncover some pleasantly surprising results.
• Though no skill is insignificant, it's possible to get mired in detail. I don't want to just add every new little skill I discover to my resume. I need a big picture focus so that I can communicate without overwhelming.

Tomorrow then, I'll focus my skills to come up with a big picture summary. In the meatime, I'm sure there's another home improvement project somewhere calling my name!

Burning Bridges is a bad Idea

I'm venturing into risky territory here: Burning Bridges. It's so risky in fact, I felt the need to capitalize the words. Trust me though, I have no desire to burn bridges as I write about burning bridges...umm duh...

It's on my mind because of two circumstances. The first is that I left a lamp of mine at my former place of business. It may not seem like a big deal , but I think about it all of the time. I really liked that lamp! I know just where I'll put it too, if I ever get it back.

I feel awkward about going to get it back because I was, you could say, ushered out under the cover of darkness -- they insisted I clean out my desk after-hours. I didn't get to say good-bye to anyone except the ones who made the decision to let me go. So, walking back into the office in the middle of the day when everyone is there to ask for it back feels...well, I feel great trepidation. I don't have any desire to burn bridges, but I don't know what everyone else is thinking. They way they let me go makes me feel like they thought I was going to cause a scene, so when I go back for my lamp I don't want them to think that I'm there for anything but...my lamp.

However, I think the lesson is obvious: I don't need to worry about what others think. (Didn't I learn that on a playground somewhere?) Really though, if I don't want to burn bridges I don't have to. If I'm consumed with what someone else is thinking or feeling and assuming that's is all negative, well, I'm sort burning the bridge from both sides. I supposed I shouldn't be blind to the feelings of others, but I can't live and die by them either. So, I'll go back within the week to get my lamp and I'll let you know how it goes, but I expect that it will be pleasantly uneventful.

The second is that I recently ran into a former coworker and they avoided me. Wait a minute?! Wasn't I the one laid off?!? Ugh. After that lovely paragraph about not assuming what other people are thinking or feeling, my paranoia is proved correct and it smacks me right in the face. Crap.

Regardless, my second lesson is also fairly obvious: I can always extend a hand to shake and if it's not returned, I'll extend my hand to someone else. There are deals out there to be made and I don't want to miss them just because I'm caught up trying to decipher every move someone makes. The difficult part is remaining open for the long-term when someone else is not. It hurts to be rejected, but those are feelings I have to deal with seperately. It's hard work to remain so open, but work that I'm committed to -- you just never know when someone will walk back into your life and you'll need them. Besides, I have great things to offer -- not everyone is going to recognize that, but I can't give up on myself.

This whole time in my life has been a great process for me -- such a great time of introspection and self-discovery. It's been a gift. In the midst of it all, I'm learning to genuinely keep doors open and to never, never, never burn a bridge.

My Mid-Career Crisis

I am having a mid-career crisis...and I'm loving it! I've held various professional positions over the years, some with more influence and responsibility than others, some that I've enjoyed more than others. Still, I've always considered myself to be an intelligent, successful and accomplished professional who would grow and develop for a lifetime.

So I got laid off? Who cares! If I hadn't been laid off, I would never have gone through such introspection nor met the people nor had the experiences I've had -- I feel richer for all of it. The few months since my lay-off have had their ups and downs, but I am truly enjoying the process of reinventing myself. Ok, so I wish it were going a lot faster, but really, I'm trusting that my future will be better for all that I'm going through now. Susan M. Heathfield over at About.com suggests some guided thinking excersises that I'll explore today to help me through my very own mid-career crisis.

Write down your ten favorite activities, the ones without which your life would feel bereft.

• Learning unique and (somewhat) practical information
• Interacting with people -- mainly with the public and with a close/small group of associates
• Engaging my heart
• Finding value where others do not
• Making connections (between people and/or businesses)
• Training/Educating others...but not in a classroom
• Using a computer -- is there a job that would require me to be on FB every day? Just kidding about FB:)
• Solving problems
• Making deals and finding bargains

Write down the top five goals you want to accomplish in your career.

This one is hard for me because I have no desire for a traditional career -- no suits, no ladders, no dog-eat-dog. If I instead think of goals I want for my life...well, that's a bit easier. So...what do I want to accomplish in my lifetime?

• Have a happy marraige and a happy family
• Be known
• Travel the world
• Learn to speak two languages besides English
• Run my own business
• Help the voiceless find their voice

List everything you’d like to do in your lifetime. These lists can run several hundred items.

Incidentally, Chris and I happened to do this a few weeks ago. Well sort of -- it turned into a list of places we'd like to visit with just a few things we wanted to accomplish. Regardless, each of our lists was about 3 pages long -- too long for this blog! What stands out to me is that Chris and I both have a wanderlust that will not be easily satisfied. We both have a passion for people, places and cultures -- it's so exciting to be on the same page in this regard!

So Susan M. Heathfield's excercises were simple enough -- still, I've discovered new things about myself. It's all like a puzzle really. I'm currently collecting pieces so that I'll be ready when the pictures comes together.

I am a Mad Scientist!

So, my attempt to blog every day lasted an entire day. Not impressive! In my defense, we've taken on quite a flooring project and it's taken up the bulk of my time. I'm really sore too...granted, it's mostly my legs and back that are sore, but I have a promising blister developing on my right thumb that's kept me from typing -- I'm blogging through the pain. No worries.

I still am committed though to blogging regularly and to keeping my blog (mostly) focused on my job search. What I'm looking for is so hard to define -- I really am in the process of reinventing myself. I've tried suits and stale office jobs -- not for me! What do I love to do?! I'm not able to give a full answer now, but what I know I love is being a Mad Scientist!

I work currently with Mad Science of Central Florida -- 5 - 10 hours a week usually. I teach science in After School Programs and sometime do Birthday Parties and School Festivals. It is so much FUN!!! I helped 150+ kids make slime at a Spring Festival last Saturday -- I could do it again next Saturday for 300+...seriously!

The job plays to my strengths as it requires:

• Working independently
• Teaching/Training
• People skills!
• Being in front of an audience
• High level of responsibilty
• Ability to control a crowd
• High degree of adaptability
• Creative thinking
• Staying reasonably organized

So what I'm looking for is something that will balance this job out. Something that is probably a bit more professional, but still informal and that obviously, would play to my strengths.

In the meantime, the Lab is calling -- there are students somewhere who need to learn science!